Should We Write Our Own Vows?
Writing your own wedding vows can add a beautiful, personal touch to your ceremony. Although it might seem to be a daunting task, it doesn’t have to be. All you need is some time, a computer and an Internet connection. If you are up for the fulfillment and challenge to write your own vows, here are some helpful tips.
The two of you should first discuss the following so you will both be on the same page:
- Are we going write our own vows together or separately?
- How long will your vows be – two sentences, a paragraph?
- Be sure that your vows include a commitment that you will be making as husband/wife. What does commitment mean to you? What does it specifically entail?
- Think about matching the overall structure of your vows to one another. For example, both could begin “I promise to …” and end with “Thank you for marrying me.”
- Talk about your relationship – its beginning, its development, its future. What attracted you to each other? What is it specifically that you love about one another? What do you want your bride/groom to know about your promise? What are your aspirations and dreams for your future together?
Although you will be writing from the heart, remember the wise saying that “there is nothing new under the sun.” Everything that has to be said has already been said somewhere. Most everything has already been created, so there’s no point in reinventing the wheel. If you are not a poet, then do not try to be one. Instead, follow these simple steps in writing your own vows.
- Go online and search “Wedding Vows,” read through a number of them and make a list of vows you like. Copy and paste the meaningful passages into a document.
- In your document, take note of ideas and sentences that you really like and start putting them together in a paragraph. Don’t worry about everything making sense right now. As you add and delete words, you will start seeing the structure and begin to have an idea of what you would like to say.
- Remember what the two of you discussed earlier about your relationship and commitment? What it means and what it involves? Start putting the sentences together from your developing paragraph so that it flows overall and comes together to make sense. Change the wording so that it reflects the two of you. Soon you will have your vows.
Remember: Andrews Wedding Ceremonies encourages couples to write their own vows if they wish. However, if you are using other wedding Officiants, then make sure this is OK with the Officiant you are using.
And if writing your own vows is not something you feel comfortable doing, then Andrews Wedding Ceremonies is here to help. Our planning manual provides 12 different standard vows, ranging from traditional to contemporary, religious to civil. There’s something for everyone.